Opening a Window

“When a door closes, somewhere a window opens.”

It’s true! It’s time to close the door on “Crossing the T,” the blog I started to chronicle my life in Boston. Since I moved out of Boston 9 months ago, I guess it was finally time. I’ve been wanting to get back into the blog world for a while now, but I was feeling completely uninspired by “Crossing the T.” I tried to reimagine it (changing the title/background) so it would be relevant to me now, but there didn’t seem to be anything left in that blog. And not just because I relocated, but also because I feel like I am a different person now than when I started “Crossing the T” three years ago (three years, what?!?!). (Transition to the token “here’s why I called my blog what I called my blog” part of this post.)

With all the feelings of new-person-hood that I briefly mentioned, one of my goals lately has been to take more time for myself/try to consider myself first when making decisions. I don’t know if you all have noticed this about me before, but I have a tendency to take on too much and stress myself out with trying to juggle the help I give others with my own commitments. While I’ve always known this about myself, the understanding that I take on too much too often slapped me in the face at the end of last year when I was working at the kennel on the weekends, babysitting my 6-year-old cousin twice a week, and working with the groomer at the kennel because her pregnancy made it more difficult for her to work with the larger dogs. The combination of my two steady jobs at the time (the kennel and babysitting) had me working 6 days a week, with a lot of the kennel days being double shift days (meaning I worked 7:30am-11:00am and 2:30pm-6:00pm). Adding the extra work to my schedule wasn’t such a heavy load at first, but it got to the point where I was staying at the kennel from 11-2:30 and going in on what should have been my day off to help bathe dogs. Needless to say, I was feeling a little drained when the new year rolled around. And while I absolutely do not regret helping the groomer when she needed it, this just made me realize that I need to consider myself and my commitments more when deciding how much I can help others so I don’t fry my nerves or exhaust myself. (Cue New Year’s resolution)

As part of this commitment to myself, I have taken up a lot of the things I like to do, but for whatever reason have not had time to pursue to a large extent over the past few years. Most importantly, I have recommitted myself to exercising regularly, through signing up for Best Body Bootcamp (which is awesome! I’ll probably do a post about it soon) and through regular attendance at a few yoga and zumba classes each week. The yoga is actually where the title of this blog comes from. One of the things our yoga instructor talks about regularly is learning to use our breath to make difficult tasks easier–she calls it coming to your breath. For example, when your leg muscles are burning because you’ve been holding a high lunge for 2 minutes, you’re supposed to focus on your breathing and breathe energy into the tight muscles so that the pose becomes easier rather than harder. We are then supposed to take this understanding and translate it into stressful life situations: when you feel stress, just breathe through the tough stuff, refocus, and work through it. For those of you that aren’t familiar with yoga, this may sound like a lot of hooey, and honestly, I sometimes still think some of the things my instructor says sound a little silly. But I also know firsthand how powerful you feel when you get through a yoga class and were rocking all the crazy poses without feeling like you were overexerting or asking too much of yourself. I know there is merit in all I’m learning in my yoga practice because I have noticed myself getting stronger in class. The challenge now is to translate that to all the other aspects of my life.

So yes, I’m closing the door on one part of my life, but I’m now embarking on an exciting and challenging search for the open window, just trying to figure things out one breath (and hopefully blog post) at a time.